Tuesday, February 8, 2011

So, while I was on that high yesterday...

I did some reading on a site and stumbled upon some discussions on loose skin after weight loss. My stomach dropped down to the floor. I remember years and years ago watching a medical show where a once morbidly obese woman was stuck in a body with tons and tons of loose skin - like the saggy, baggy elephant. She had surgery on every part of her body to remove all the excess skin. Of course it leaves scars, but yes, she looked amazing afterwards when the scars had faded. You can tell I had food issues then, because I remember one of my thoughts being, "What if she gains the weight back?"

So, while I was reading this article on it, and seeing the plethora of responses of men and women who also had loose skin, it sunk in. My visual of Melissa at 175 is that of Melissa at 175 when she was 17 years old! Not a 42 year old woman, with saggy skin. I was a bit freaked out. Now, NOTHING like that would keep me from losing weight and getting more fit because really, what's worse? Being fat and unhealthy? or being thinner and fit and with saggy skin?

Of course, I cannot know how it will turn out. I don't recall saggy skin when I dropped 50 lbs before (and was within 20 pounds of my ideal weight), but I'm quite a bit older, weigh more now than my highest then AND I've had one more baby.

I 'think' what will happen is that my legs and arms will 'mostly' be OK, maybe a bit swingy on the inner thighs and underarm area, but my tummy I'm almost sure of it will be a skin hanging fest and not so much from weight, but two huge babies - 22" both of them, 10 lbs 9 ozs for one and 11 lbs 14 ozs with the other. AND with the youngest, I was carrying an enormous amount of amniotic fluid too and was swollen like mad. For now, I have a bigger tummy and 50,000 stretch marks. I guess later I have to accept my life's battle scars are something I have to own. And I'm sure my spouse would much rather have a healthier and fit wife with saggy areas of skin than a plump, unhealthy wife. Of that, how could there be any doubt.

But, I have time to come to grips with reality and it's already sinking in with about 20 hours to stew on it already. No one would ever know with clothes on or even a swimsuit, just me, my doctors and my spouse will know any possible battle scars.

Now, onto a different topic! Yesterday I mostly skipped out on exercise. I powered through a bit of pain the day before, but I was in a lot of pain in my calves yesterday. I did get in a 1 mile plus walk and added another mile walking around my house later in the day - cleaning, walking up and down stairs, playing with my younger son. Still sore this morning, but MUCH better. First day I've missed in more than two weeks.

Scales are a little up this morning (had probably a salty dinner last night as it was soup), but still keeps me at ten pounds lost, so that's all OK.

Stats 2/8/11:

Weight - Beginning: 255.6   Now: 245.0

Walked it out in 2011 - 113.4 miles
Exercise totals in hours: minutes - 35:00

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