Sunday, October 30, 2011

My perspective of this month as it winds down

This month was very difficult and now that our lives are beginning to return to normal (not quite there yet as my mother in law is having a bad allergic reaction still and barely eating as her mouth heals from the outbreak), I can look at this month and see it for the victory it really is.

Yes, I haven't exercised in 3 weeks. Yes, I have barely lost anything this month, but... I didn't turn to food. I didn't 'want' to miss exercise and I didn't want to give up. Life just got a bit out of control and I handled the curve balls as well as I could. I know that starting on Tuesday, I'll be back at the gym and doing what I was doing for months - just having to jump back in and moving on. I can still make my goal of 175 by my birthday too.

I cannot and will not beat myself up for this month of slow loss on the scale. Period.

Stats for 10/30/11:

Beginning weight: 255.6  Now: 181.0

Saturday, October 29, 2011

Halloween and the thinner body

Halloween has always been one of my favorite holidays. We always dress up (I think I've not dressed up maybe 5 years total). However, being overweight on Halloween is very limiting. First, costumes are cut small, so if you want to go buy a costume at a store, their size large is meant for like a size 8-10. Plus sizes are sizes 14-16.  Add to that, for some reason, women's costumes are mostly over sexualized. Who wants to see a fat, sexy Little Red Riding Hood? or a fat, sexy police woman? It's hard to feel good in a big, plus size, especially in store bought costumes that seem to be cut for a mannequin and not for a real body.

So, there is the "let's go to Goodwill". Guess what, again, it's hard to find plus size stuff. Gowns? Retro skirts? Nope. People used to be thinner, so it's hard to find fun stuff in the bigger sizes and then when you do, it's a man's suit or shirt and you feel frumpy and even more huge. At least I always did. Do you know how many times I went as a man? And it's mostly because I couldn't find fun women's costumes/clothes to wear.

One year our entire family went as characters from The Lord of The Rings. Me? I went as a peasant woman from Rohan. I found a bunch of wool skirts, cut them down and made 3-4 skirts into ONE that fit me - and I needed all 4 skirts to do it! The costume was great, but I wasn't the sexy Elf princess any other beautiful female character from the movie - nope, a fat, peasant woman - plain and blah...

Last year we wanted to go as characters from Toy Story. I got my youngest son a Buzz Lightyear costume off ebay (as it was way less expensive than a new one or making one). I got my older son an all blue jumpsuit an alien head piece for the Pizza Planet alien. We already had a felt cowboy hat, so I went to goodwill and found a shirt for my husband to be Sheriff Woody and then made the vest, added buttons to the shirt and a drawstring pull and fake cowboy boots. Last year for me, I was stuck. What could I be? The only thing I could think of was Mrs. Potato Head as she was the only round character. Me as Bo Peep? Nah... Me as Jessie? Nah... only Mrs. Potato Head would fit my body shape at all.

Well, last year, I didn't get to the adult costumes, so it didn't matter. My younger son wanted to go as Buzz Lightyear again this year so I decided to get the other costumes together. I beefed up my older son's costume a bit, did my husband's costume and then realized, I didn't need to be Mrs. Potato Head. I "could" be Jessie if I wanted to. Sure, I'm not skinny like she is, but I'm not rotund any more either.

So, I went to Goodwill to find a plain white shirt (I didn't have any) that I could work with and all the shirts I found were too big. Now I'm not tiny, but wow!!! That's a first! Then, I realized while looking around, I could fit into a lot of things now. I might not even need to buy plus size costume pieces. It's liberating!

Of course, when I was at the fabric store, I about choked when I looked at what size costume pattern I would need - a size 20!!! Yikes! But, that isn't considered plus sized. I picked up a pattern to be the Queen of Hearts next year (or some year). My husband can be the Mad Hatter (my own personal Johnny Depp). Yep, I can wear something like that now! And it feels great!!

Stats for 10/29/11:

Beginning weight: 255.6  Now: 182.0

Friday, October 28, 2011

So this month of October

Hasn't been that kind to me. While I escaped the pneumonia, I did get a UTI that led to being put on an antibiotic that made me retain tons of water, I got a neck sprain that led to 2 weeks (or longer) of all day, daily headaches, I got traumatized at the lab with the phlebotomist unable to find my vein and had three pokes and lots of digging again and discovered my thyroid is completely out of whack again which might be why I have felt more tired and run down.

What else hasn't been kind is the scale.  I showed my chart while it was going up and up with the antibiotic, but it's trip down has been slow and it never came completely down. I'm still more than 2 pounds heavier that when I started. I haven't exercised besides a couple of walks (mostly due to letting the neck strain heal - any movement aggravated the muscle), but I haven't been overeating.

Here is the chart for the last 30 days:

And, my caloric intake averages 1530 for the last month. I started the month weighing 182.8 and I'm at 182.2 today. No progress at all. And that has me a bit worried because I'm hungry. Every day I am fighting the demons of just stuffing my face. I think part of it is my thyroid. Part of it is the time of year (I always want to eat and eat in the fall) and part of it is the lack of exercise. By not exercising 5 times a week, I'm also not losing about 2000 calories a week. Exercising, for me, is also an appetite suppressant. If I exercise, I for some reason, don't feel as hungry. So, I haven't been exercising and not burning calories and I feel ravenous.

Ugh... there isn't much I can do and like with the rest of the journey, I just have to take it one day at a time and not get worried about tomorrow or next week or next month. I just have to do what I can do and that's that... but it does worry me about being able to lose much more and then being able to keep it off if eating like now is actually leading to a slight gain and I'm still hungry and 1530 calories a day is NOT a lot of calories.

And, with taking it one day at a time, today I'm doing a spinning class. I figured that would be a good jumping back in class as I can take it at my own pace. Wish me luck and no sore neck muscles!

Stats for 10/28/11:

Beginning weight: 255.6  Now: 182.2

Thursday, October 27, 2011

Even the best of plans can be thrown

I was so sure of my day today that I put in all my meals breakfast. I knew I would have an apple with jif for breakfast (and I did), sausage, eggs and hash browns for lunch as I didn't get to having them yesterday, (didn't happen again today). And I knew I was going to make a pork roast with cabbage and sauerkraut (that didn't happen either.) and, I was signed up to do my first class sincde I injured my neck. I was ready and looking forward to it. The plan for the day was to deal with Halloween costumes. Everything was all set. Or so I thought.

So, the day started normal, I had to cajole my teen outnof bed in the morning, packed lunches for the three boys and first sent my husband and older son off, and then a hour later, my younger son. I joined the little guy with breakfast. I dropped him off at school (driving today as it was raining) and camenhome and went upstairs to veg for a bit while my mother in law slept.

Then things changed. A few minutes aft getting home, my mother in law calls me and I can see immediately that she is not good. She is having an allergic reaction to something which we had gone through before about 18 months prior. That time resulted in a trip to the ER. So, this morning I spent time tracking down her doctor, the dentist (as it appeared to be a reaction to something done at the dental cleaning she had 36-48 hours prior on both those occasions). And dealing with a slightly freaking out mother in-law whith whom I can never tell how much is real and how much is drama.

When it appeared the antihistamine wasn't working, we called the advise nurse who wanted us to call the ambulance based on the description of the reaction. We could see the reaction was slow and not as extreme as it sounded, so we opted to drive into the hospital which is only a mile away.

Then of course, started the waiting. We were there for almost 4 hours for nothing. The ER doctors basically said that the reaction doesn't seem to be threatening and suspected the newer blood pressure medicines and not anything with the dentist. They released her and we came home and started our own investigating. We looked up cleaning appointments and then my others in law drove to the dentist (as they never called back) and got the info she needed and yes indeed, it seems to be an allergic reaction to the cloudier varnishbthey gave her this time and only once before. They even gave here a pamphlet which listed her actions as a rare case scenario.

Then it was deal with kids, and totally change dinner plans. Sauerkraut on a swollen and rashy mouth wouldn't be nice, so I came up with plan B of pumpkin, parsnip and pear creamed soup, apple chicken sausage and brussells sprouts. Lunch earlier was not a nice at home lunch either, but grabbed nutritional bars and cheese sticks. In the end I ended over my calories about about 200 for the day and no time for exercise. I was on the go from 6:30 am until now, 9:45 pm. Oh forgot, had to rush to take my older son to the doctor for his flu shot too. Just a crazy day.

And tomorrow I have to, like really have to work on those Halloween costumes as I need them for Sunday and if anything goes awry, I'll want the time on Saturday to get the needed supplies.

I thought we were over the whole drama of everyone getting sick, but surprise! Guess not.

Stats for 10/27/11:

Beginning weight: 255.6. Now: 182.0

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Begin to feel like myself again

After so much crap going around the house with sicknesses and then with being super busy and wearing myself out and getting a cold on top of it all (and that neck strain), I've kind of been in a rut. I wasn't ever giving up or going hog wild, but it was so hard to resist temptations and I did cave on a few sweet things. Things I can normally pass up with no problem were all of a sudden too hard to walk by without grabbing it.

But yesterday I did well. I didn't feel hungry. I didn't feel deprived and I felt good and strong all day. I even cooked mini pizzas and mini apple pies and didn't cave on eating any.

This morning, I can feel the same resolve. I don't feel that tug to grab an apple pie even though it's sitting on the counter - or sugar cookies or anything we have all over the kitchen that I shouldn't eat. It must mean that I'm well and rested.

I'm really in the mood to eat some eggs and sausage though. I think I'll make that for lunch. Feeling lazy this morning, I decided to look up how much a similar breakfast at McDonald's would cost me in calories. (I have frozen hashbrowns, sausage patties and eggs at home I could make, but I can't make those until my mother in law is awake and she usually sleeps until 10 am). I went to this link:  I can't quite figure out the number of calories in the exact combination of what I would eat, but it's definitely more at McDonald's than at home. I'm actually having a bit of a craving for a hotcake, so I looked up how many calories those were, have tempted to get the Big Breakfast with hotcakes (skipping the biscuit). That meal is about 1100 calories. I used to get that fairly frequently. Now it's true it would be my breakfast and lunch as it would fill me up for two meals, but I would then eat snacks and a huge dinner.

Breakfast foods - eggs and meat and veggies are actually not too bad in the calories department. It's when you add in the biscuits and hotcakes with butter and syrup that takes things over the top. An order of hotcakes at McDonald's is 470 calories and you know you would be hungry in an hour if that's the only thing you ate for breakfast. Not only that, the blood sugars always crashed when I ate pancakes for breakfast - even 'healthy' ones made with whole grains. Carbs are carbs as far as blood sugars react to them.

So, after reading that, I decided I did not need a McDonald's breakfast and will make myself eggs, sausage and hash browns for lunch. Two eggs, one hashbrown, one sausage and a slice of cheese with a dab of butter for cooking will be 556 calories - a good sized lunch (the time of day I'm hungriest). I typically eat an apple with cinnamon with 3 tablespoons of peanut butter for lunch. That combo is 375 calories and I always have to grab a 150-200 calorie snack about an hour after eating it (usually cheese). I won't need to grab a snack with this egg lunch. Might throw in some green pepper too which calories are negligible.

Good thing I ate breakfast already or else I would be drooling and torturing myself with writing about my lunch. I don't get a hankering for such a meal very often, but when I do, I partake as besides the cholesterol, it's a good meal. (especially when I throw in veggies. Though my diet is never lacking in fruit and veggies).

Stats for 10/26/11:

Beginning weight: 255.6  Now: 183.2
Total number of hours exercised: 282
Total number of miles walked in 2011: 832/1000

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

And I missed another day, but this time I knew it.

I was so busy yesterday that I just never got the chance to sit down and write out my thoughts. I don't have much time this morning either, but wanted to put out a blip so that no one is worried about me.

Yesterday was 'cooking' day to prepare for the rest of the week. That included going to the grocery store (biked there) and getting all the stuff for cooking. Then coming home, doing school pick up and then making yogurt, and two types of bread (total of 4 loaves) and then dinner - lentils.

We were expecting someone for a meeting at our house at 7 pm. I was planning on making mini pizzas for lunches after that meeting, but that one hour meeting took over two hours, so it was after 9 pm when that person left and there was just no time.

Did some kitchen clean up - put away the breads and the leftover lentils and went upstairs about 10 pm. At that time I knew I could write in my blog, but I also knew I was exhausted and I didn't want to give up 30 minutes of sleep just to write a tiny bit for my blog. I haven't even touched my baking blog despite doing lots of baking in the last week! Time is just too scarce.

The good news is that my neck strain seems to be mostly heeled, so I'm going to try step class tomorrow to see if I can jump back into working out.

The bad news is without working out, I feel like I'm in a rut and I definitely make worse food decisions when I'm not working out. The last two days I've been eating too many carbs and eating at maintenance. I'm not pigging out, but I'm not eating how I should be either and I really think it's the lack of exercise.

OK, gotta run. I'm chaperoning my younger son's field trip today. Should be fun as we're going to the Science Museum. Little guy is pretty excited about it!

Stats for 10/25/11:

Beginning weight: 255.6  Now: 185.4

Sunday, October 23, 2011

Oh my goodness I missed a day!

How did that happen? I even had to check now as I didn't believe that I missed a day. I haven't missed a day since I started this at the tail end of 2010.

I can understand it as every second of yesterday was full. I woke up at 7:30 am and dropped at 1 am - falling asleep instantly last night.

The good news is that I didn't go off my 'diet' (hate that word).  I ate a bit more than usually as I was making a cake and not trying the frosting and batter is pretty much impossible, but I didn't go crazy and ended the day around 1600 calories for the day (target is 1400).

Yesterday started with me needing to get my older son up for school as he had his homecoming parade. Then I came home showered, breakfasted and then went to the parade. Did some laundry, made and ate lunch and then went to the pumpkin patch with my youngest and with my husband. After the pumpkin patch I went to the grocery store, made dinner and then started on this cake I needed to make for Sunday. Was making the cake and decorations from 7:30 pm until midnight. Then needed a bit of unwinding time and remembered a couple things I forgot with the cake, cleaning up a bit and then falling into bed.

This morning was a whir too - up, breakfast, cleaning the rest of the kitchen, off to Ethical Society, to a grocery store for items I can't get near me, home and soon, time to start dinner and so on.

So, I didn't miss a day because of being ashamed to come on and admit my shortcomings. The day just escaped from me - the entire day.

Water weight is still coming off, but taking it's time. Little by little, but at least it's moving out.

Stats for 10/23/11:

Beginning weight: 255.6   Now: 184.0

Friday, October 21, 2011

Colds and pains in the neck

I think the cold is already on it's way out. I'm able to breathe better today than yesterday, so that's a good sign. Yesterday I really felt crappy as I was struggling to breathe normally. Breathing from the nose is not over-rated!

But I thought this strain in the neck was getting better, but... maybe not. I was sitting at Panera this morning and I turned me head and started to feel this shooting pain up the side of my head and it was sharp. I could feel the neck tightening. I know it's 100% muscular, but man, for so long? I'll have to see my doctor about it if it doesn't go away soon. As it is, I'm beginning to feel like a bum without exercising for a week! A week!!! That's a long time and I'm beginning to feel lazy about it. On the other hand, I don't see I could have either as that neck thing is really putting a crimp in things and this cold too. No fun!

Not much more to add. It's going to be a busy weekend, as usual these days, but at least it will be a lot of family time - fun family time which we haven't had in quite awhile.

Stats for 10/21/11:

Beginning weight: 255.6  Now: 185.6

Thursday, October 20, 2011

Full blown cold, but water is leaving

I went to bed last night feeling so horrible. I still feel pretty horrible this morning as my head feels it weighs about 500 pounds as it's full of gunk. I have a full blown cold and like I usually get them, it's completely filling my sinuses.

The good news is that I had to get up three times last night to pee. While that's a pain in the butt to lose sleep because of a full bladder, at least my bladder was full all three times. This past week I've only been about 1 lbs lighter in the morning than when I went to bed. Usually, I would lose about two pounds a night. So, you can imagine how horrible it felt to go to bed weighing 193.4 and I drank more water before going to sleep! I thought I would wake up to see a weight over 190 for sure.

Well, I got lucky as I said and peed a lot three times and I woke up weighing 189.0 in the morning. That is 4.5 pounds of water lost overnight. And, I've been peeing this morning more than usually. Hopefully it means that water weight will go FAST!

Hubby and I were supposed to go out on our already late anniversary date this weekend, but it is being postponed yet again. First, I don't feel well. Who wants to have a romantic date only a couple times a year and waste one on a weekend where I'm sick? Second, there is just no time for it. My mother in law is having a minor outpatient surgery tomorrow, my son is having his homecoming parade and game on Saturday, I need to bake a cake for a friend for Sunday, and we have promised our younger son a trip to the pumpkin patch and time is running out. When we would fit in a date?

So, that means moving it to Halloween weekend - we'll see. I have a feeling this will be like so often is the case. It will never happen and when it does it will seem meaningless. Though, having a date shouldn't need a 'reason'.

Not much more. I have to run some errands to prepare for this weekend!

Stats for 10/20/11:

Beginning weight: 255.6  Now: 189.0

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

I really feel like I've been hit by a truck

My son gave me his cold and I feel like a whale as I'm holding so much water. And oh yes, I still have that constant headache from that muscle strain. And the weather sucks. And ive been flying solo as my husband has been out of town for a conference. It all equals a hit by a Mac truck feeling. And the scale? Holy crap. Tomorrow I will be over 190 pounds as I just stepped on the scale before going to bed and it said 193.4. What??? That will be a 12 pound gain in less than a week. I finished the antibiotic, but it's still working it's water retaining magic it seems. And it is getting depressing, I was getting so close to my goal and then BAM! Even though I know it's an artificial gain, I still feel horrible. I feel big and gross and sick.... Well, I am sick. I'm in bed at 10 pm and if I didn't have the iPad, I would be skipping today's post which would be the first time since I started. That is how blah I feel. Blah!

Stats for 10/18/11: Beginning weight 255.6. Now: 189.6
Total miles walked in 2011: 829/1000

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

This neck strain

Well, I'm now pretty convinced that these headaches are being caused by a neck muscle strain. I try so hard to be careful about my form in the strength training class, but I can almost remember feeling it immediately after doing it during some crunches.

So today is supposed to be a strength training day, but I think I'm going to take it easy and just walk today. The weather is grand and my body needs to heal. I've been having daily, all day headaches for over a week now (maybe close to 2 weeks?) and I need to address that pain, not ignore it. So, some heat and resting that muscle group (not doing crunches for a few days) will be what I try. Some self-massage too as my massage therapist husband is on a trip until Wednesday evening for work.

Yesterday I managed a couple miles of walking and that's about it for exercise. I could stand to do some yard work, but I'm going to hold off on that too as stooping isn't probably the best way to deal with that muscle strain either.

It's really interesting how such a thing can give me so much trouble - like radiating pain all through my head, I need to take excedrin kind of pain. I hate that!!!

And today is the last day of the antibiotic for the urinary tract infection. And holy crap am I holding water weight. I grabbed my larger pants today as I was beginning to feel the bloat in my size 12s and forget any size 10s. Officially I'm now well over the poundage where I would need to add back that slice of pizza, but I know it's all water as my eating has been spot on - eating between 1200-1600 with an average of 1450 for this past 5 days is NOT over eating. It's all this water retention from the antibiotic. I hope it at least cleared up the infection! (which I never really felt I had).

Stats for 10/18/11:

Beginning weight: 255.6  Now: 187.8 EEEKKK!!!
Total miles walked in 2011: 827/1000

Monday, October 17, 2011

So this thing about blood sugars

So, I was doing some reading on the A1C test and fasting numbers for people who have issues with their blood sugars and it seems there is more to it than what doctors typically do. Here is info on the test from the Mayo clinic:

First of all, my chart no longer says that I'm diabetic, pre-diabetic or anything. I didn't have two tests that said I had high blood sugars - just one 'officially'. Yet, I know I have issues with my blood sugar. It's only because of what I'm doing with my diet and exercise that I have gotten my blood sugars in a good place. If I were to eat pasta and bread and rice and other simple sugars, my blood sugars would be high and I would be considered diabetic. I'm almost 100% positive of that. But, the doctor says I'm not diabetic. Really?

It used to be that doctors only would give the fasting blood sugars test to check for diabetes. If it was over 100, then they would call for more tests. Then it became more common to give the A1C test that checks for how much sugar has attached to red blood cells over the blood cell's life span of about 3 months. While this is much more accurate than a one time fasting blood sugar value, it seems it's not that accurate either. Why? because people with diabetes have shorter living red blood cells, so they don't typically live to be 3 months (too much sugar bonded to them? Other damage?). People who control their sugars better, having longer living red blood cells, so they might live for 4 months, say, and therefore the red blood cells have a longer time to absorb/stick to sugar molecules. So, someone could have a high A1C, but not have blood sugar issues. This doctor says the only reliable way to be sure is to do daily blood sugar testing after meals.

Check out this link that explains more:

Now, I don't believe everything I read/hear, but it makes sense. An average blood cell lives to be 3 months. But is it the same for everyone? No. How can it be? And, even things like carrying a sickle cell anemia gene can throw off the tests, pregnancy, blood transfusions, anemia, etc.

Also, people can manipulate the tests. If someone has diabetes and they know (like I knew) that I would be getting a blood test every three months, they also know that during that time some/half of their red blood cells would die. So, a person could eat clean for a month of that 3 month window and drastically lower their A1C result. Eat higher sugars for 60 days, eat less sugars for 30 days and there you go, a lower test score which will keep your doctor off your back. But who are you fooling? And why???? It's about your health, right? And not fooling a doctor or test?

Basically, it's another tool to be used, but the best tool is to take blood readings post meals and even this isn't that accurate as the test strips don't have to be that accurate - they could be 20 points off either direction and still be considered accurate enough statistically. But, it's the best affordable way to check.

So, according to everything in my file now. I'm not diabetic. But....I am. I know that if I eat pasta and rice and such - especially without proteins to accompany the meal/snack and if I were to check my blood sugars 1 and 2 hours after eating, my blood sugar levels would be considered too high to be 'normal'. I don't get huge spikes, but I do get over 120 2 hours after a meal and it should be closer to 100 if I 'truly' don't have blood sugar issues. When I eat a meal low in carbs, my 2 hour post meal blood sugar levels are about 80 and below. Obviously, my body can't handle sugars that well.

What this all means is that I know how to control my blood sugar issues, but I do have issues with them. I just caught them early and can control with diet and exercise so that I'm healthy. And, if I had eaten like this all along, I wouldn't have ever known I have issues with blood sugars as no test would have picked it up, but then again, if I had eaten like this all along, I probably wouldn't have become insulin resistant anyway. I did this to myself by being a carb addict.

Can I live like this the rest of my life? Yes I can, but if ever my insulin resistance increases and it would mean giving up fruits and such, I would then look to taking medications to help control my sugars as then it would start getting into missing important nutrients in my diet too if I gave up fruits. Rice, pasta, breads don't give much if any true nutrition. So giving those up is really a non issue.

Beginning weight: 255.6  Now: 185.6

Sunday, October 16, 2011

This antibiotic I'm on is something else

I have a urinary tract infection which my doctor discovered when I got my blood work done for checking on everything else. Since I've been on this antibiotic, I've been holding fluids like crazy. The containers says to drink more with this medication, but didn't say anything about water retention. But, when I look up side effects online, about 1% of people experience water retention. Count me in that 1%. Here's a picture of my chart from the last 30 days.

First jump up is impending period and then my typical stall-out, slowly coming down as is typical for any given month for me. Second steep jump up is a combo of ovulation (I think) and this medication. Good thing my eating has been on track or else I would be freaking out. I am now "this" close to technically needing to add another piece of pizza pie, but I'm not going to change it. This is just a fluke. (You can click on the chart to make it bigger).

Also, it still says my current target weight is 175. That was my goal for 2011. I'm now thinking of 165 for an end weight, but not for 2011 and it's still all flexible.

My husband is gone for a few days for a conference, so doing this parenting thing solo. Not much changing terribly, just needing to take the older one to school in the morning as an added duty. Usually my husband drives him, but I'm always up helping with breakfasts and lunches.

Not much else for today.

Stats for 10/16/11:

Beginning weight: 255.6  Now: 185.2

Saturday, October 15, 2011

Happy 18th Anniversary to me and hubby!

We were going to go out this evening, but then my husband remembered we had that party to go to yesterday, so we are going out next weekend. Today we did body pump together. I snapped a picture of the two of us as it was funny that we both grabbed gray shorts and a yellow top to wear to the gym - and who does a workout together on their anniversary? (Super blurry as I was unable to get a picture in the mirror properly). Sven still is 12-15 pounds lighter than me despite being 6.5" taller!

Then we cleaned downstairs and then I decorated for Halloween with my youngest and made Halloween cookies.

But get this. As you know, my MIL lives with us and she tells us her every move if we like it or not. This morning, she was up and dressed a bit early (she tends to stay in bed until 10 am). But, I didn't think much of it. She was in a strange mood and wished us a Happy Anniversary, but it was kind of said in a way that was out of obligation, not that she 'felt' it. We had breakfast and then we hurried to get ourselves and the youngest off to the gym.

We came home and there's a note that she is going to the opera.

Now, I could care less if she wanted to go to the opera, but when she's gone before (it's held in the Imax movie theater near us and it's a live recording of a Metropolitan Opera broadcast around to various Imax theaters - at least I think it's live), she's told us about it, reminding us about it, etc. She has made NO MENTION of going to an opera since she's been back from Europe. Why? I think she felt guilty for going out on our anniversary and not offering to stay home so that maybe we could go if we wanted to go. Or, offering to watch the kids so that we could do something else.

Really, she has no obligation to watch the kids and if she had plans for today (as it's not like the opera production comes every week), but that she was so secretive about it bugs the crap out of me. She just proves over and over again what a selfish piece of #($*! she is.

But, the upside is that she was gone for hours today and so we had the house without her constant presence and comments. So, I'm glad she was gone - that was the best gift she could give us...

Stats for 10/15/11:

Beginning weight: 255.6  Now: 183.4
Total hours exercised in 2011: 280
Total miles walked in 2011: 825/1000

Friday, October 14, 2011

The latest blood work - the good and the bad

Good news and bad news at the doctor - good news is that my blood work for diabetes is perfect - not even registering as pre-diabetic for the A1C or fasting. Both those scores improved since last time and they were pretty good before (fine for fasting, on the borderline of normal/prediabetic back then).

When I started, I had a fasting of 145 or something like that on December 5th. When they tested again in the beginning of January, they repeated the fasting and gave me the A1C test. In January the fasting blood sugar level was 230 or something like that and my A1C was 8.6. Completely in line with out of control diabetes. He wanted to test me again in 3-4 months when my thyroid was better and I had dropped some weight and started exercising and started a lower carb diet. I came back in 3.5 months and my fasting blood sugar level dropped to 94 and my A1C dropped to 5.8. Fasting blood sugar was out of even the pre-diabetes range and the 5.8 was at the very beginning of being at risk for the pre-diabetes range. This time, 5 months later, my fasting blood sugar was 90 and my A1C was 5.4. Both completely normal and out of any risk range. (A little footnote here, though. I will be talking more about the A1C test and those scores and what they can mean or not mean - maybe tomorrow I'll blog about it.)

Back in December, my cholesterol level was around 236 and my good cholesterol was too low (another sign of diabetes), but he also said that my cholesterol level was probably high due to my thyroid, so that he didn't want to do anything at that time until my thyroid got back in control. More on that in a bit. Anyway, the levels of my cholesterol in May were 190, but my good cholesterol was still a shade too low. This time my cholesterol level was 202, a tiny high, but  I've increased the good cholesterol by 20 points in 5 months up to 67. It was 42 in May. Which means the increase in my cholesterol is 100% from good cholesterol as my bad cholesterol actually went down 5 points. The doctor was thrilled because my thyroid is very low again and I still had very good scores on the cholesterol, so he expects it to drop a lot in total number once my thyroid is working properly again.

Blood pressure is fine. A little higher than readings at home, but I had a bad headache and again, with my thyroid not working properly, it could be raising my blood pressure (as it was doing before). Blood pressure was 122/82. (I have been typically getting readings around 110/74 at home).

The bad is that my thyroid is way low again. It should read 3.0 or lower. When I started it was 47 which is very low. Then in January it was 14 and then in May it was 3.1. Now it is 10.4 And it explains a lot of returning symptoms - sluggishness, heart arrhythmia, sleep disturbances, hot flashes, and headaches. These are all things I had before I went into the doctor's office last December, but back then with so many things wrong, I didn't know what was causing what as so much was out of whack - blood sugars, blood pressure and thyroid. Now with just the thyroid out of whack, I now know that it was the thyroid and the thyroid alone that was making me feel so bad. I guess that's the upside to this. If I ever feel these symptoms return again in the future, I'll know to have my thyroid checked out.

And the other bad news is that I have a urinary tract infection. I didn't feel it yet, but it was quite obvious from the lab results that I had one. So, I'm being treated for that now. Does that mean I didn't escape getting sick? Even though I don't feel sick? LOL

And he didnt' even mention my weight. Nurse did and said I was doing a great job, but doctor didn't. I also decided not to get test strips and needles for the glucose meter as how I'm eating now is fine for me. I feel better without all the carbs and the increased fruit and occasional slice of banana bread isn't hurting me any if my A1C is now 5.4. Though, after reading a bit, I might change my mind on that, but for now it's all OK as I did get a good feel with my meals with the few tests I took.

So basically, look what exercise, dropping weight and dropping simple carbs from your diet can do? I've completely turned my health around and expect even better results when my thyroid hormone levels are normalized again. I didn't even know it would be possible, but it so can be.

Stats for 10/14/11:

Beginning weight: 255.6  Now: 182.2

Thursday, October 13, 2011

People are beginning to 'know' me as the thinner me

We have only lived in this town and state for just under 2 years and we are still just kind of feeling our way out with meeting new people. Now, I have met our neighbors and are friendly with many of them and there are a couple of moms I talk with in the mornings, and there are my husband's co-workers we do things with on occasion. They all know me 'before' the weight loss, but... I'm beginning to meet more and new people now and they only know me as me now and that is interesting.

For instance, my son's first grade teacher (who is great by the way). She sees me every morning as I bring in my younger son and sometimes I am dressed for the gym. So, what she knows of me is that I am a slightly chubby woman who is working on her fitness and probably trying to lose a few pounds. She has said on several occasions (yesterday being one of those times) that she needs to start going to the gym - that she has gained a lot of weight since she stopped running due to a foot injury and that she envies my ability to go to the gym. So, yesterday I told her that I had lost 75 pounds this past year and got scared into it by health concerns. She was floored. She had no idea and how would she? First grade classrooms are on the opposite side of the building from kindergarten classrooms and even if she did see me in the hall or something, how would she notice some random parent and then connect that person with a student's parent the following year.

Same with at the ethical society meetings we go to every week. We have new members and new children. They met me as I am now. And the people at the gym. They have no idea. I started the gym mid-June when I had already dropped a lot of weight. And I just joined the PTA. Again, they have no idea (except for the few moms I know from last year). I don't feel the need to announce my weight loss either. I'm not trying to hide it, but it's not relevant unless someone asks me about what I'm doing for health/fitness. And it's interesting.

It's interesting because people treat me differently. Or, I'm perceiving that they treat me differently. It's impossible to tease it out. They might be treating me different because of their prejudices against heavy people or I could be acting different/more confident because I feel better about myself, so they pick up on that and treat me better in return. I definitely am noticing more male attention - even young men will steal an extra glance which at least makes me feel like I'm not that old yet.

And I wonder as time goes by and after I maintain, if people will forget that I used to be so heavy - especially the people I am meeting here. They knew me for such a brief time at my heavy weight. I might have to bring old photos to prove it. Anyway, it's intesesting.

Bodypump this evening for exercise.

Stats for 10/13/11:

Beginning weight: 255.6  Now: 180.4

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Added a step

And I mean that literally! Today I did body step and to make it more challenging since I can't do the propulsion movements, I decided it was time to add another riser under the step. And you know, that is not an easy adjustment! I've been using just one riser with the step (or no risers initially) since I started with the step in what was it, March? April? And way back when (over a decade ago), I used one riser. I have never been fit enough to need more than riser, so it is a lot of muscle relearning. And yes, it upped the intensity alright. Still don't feel all powerful because of the lack of jumps when the rest of the class can do them it seems, but it is less to do with fitness and more to do with physiology or injury.

Not much else. My anniversary is coming up this Saturday, but I think we will wait a week to go out to dinner and we have a party to go to on Friday. It's hard enough to fit in a date normally, but two in one weekend? Basically impossible and this way we can spread it out a bit.

Really tired! Insomnia last night, but I got my workout in!

Stats for 10/12/11:

Beginning weight: 255.6. Now: 181.3
Exercise total hours: 278.5
Total miles walked in 2011: 821/1000

Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Losing weight is really, really expensive in the short run

I am in the process of emptying out my closet from all my too small clothes and oh my goodness.  That is a lot of clothes to be dumping. I just did my shoe closet last night. Again, every pair of shoes I had before is too big. I can make the athletic shoes work, but not the loafers and heels. And then there are bras and underwear, fitness clothes. Coats? Can we talk about the expense of coats, even used coats? Wow! It is so more apparent this fall and winter because I am emptying out sizes 18s and 20s to make room for 10s and 12s. There is no way I can wear almost any of what I had before. Maybe my heaviest winter coat, but that's it.

And the shoes. Rows of shoes. All too big. All of them. From 10 to 15 years of shoes.

So, now I am toying with I should just donate them or try to sell them. I will not keep them as gaining the weight back is not an option because of health concerns. I will probably keep my 12s even if I make it into 10s, just in case, but 18s and 20s? That is just not an option to go back there. Period. Only one pair of size 20 jeans will be kept for memory's sake. The rest is bye-bye. I will take a picture of the heap of stuff before it is all out of here and it won't be all of it as I have donated some along the way as charities have called, but there is still so, so much. Wow. Just wow!!!

Stats for 10/11/11:

Beginning weight: 255.6  Now: 181.6

Monday, October 10, 2011

Getting a freebie day with my husband!

Today the kids have school and everyone is healthy enough to go to school - yay! But, it's a federal holiday, so my husband doesn't have work! A day with both of us free and the kids are occupied? What??? Of course, my mother in law is here, but we'll go and take a walk and enjoy this continued beautiful weather streak we've been having recently. That will be so nice as it has been a very, very, very long time since we've had any couple time. And, it's our anniversary this weekend, so it's a double bonus.

Not sure I'll fit in any formal exercise today, but will probably walk 3-4 miles today or maybe even bike ride somewhere. Ooh fun! Maybe a picnic lunch? Even nicer! Yay!!!! And I didn't even realize we had this special date day until Friday evening. I knew the kids had school, but totally forgot that hubby would have the day off. And with so much sickness in the house recently, I didn't even know on Friday evening if we could find a way to enjoy the day anyway. But we can and that is making my day feel great already. Even though I still needed to get up before dawn to get the oldest kid ready for school. And today I'm doing my much delayed blood work to check on everything again. I'm not even worked up about a blood draw? Yep. I've come a long way in this year. (please cross your fingers that that will be a good and easy blood draw like last time - hoping added fitness and weight loss helps with such things?)

Stats for 10/10/11:

Beginning weight: 255.6  Now: 181.0

Sunday, October 9, 2011

Tried something on today...

something that I thought I would never be able to wear again. I was rummaging through my closet looking for a particular dress (turns out it's in the laundry) and ran across my grandmother's navy blue dress suit. I don't know what era it's from, but I would guess early 60s? Late 50s? Not sure. It was something that she saved in her closet even though it was way too small for her, so it must have been special. Then again, she saved every parkay container and baggie she ever used to keep "just in case".

When she died, a few months before my 16th birthday, it was quite sudden and unexpected. It was August and there wasn't much time to get things in order and that included getting things to wear. I didn't have mourning clothes or even anything remotely appropriate for a funeral, but my mom found this dress suit in grandma's closet and thought it might work.

I don't recall details about how it fit. I do know I wasn't done growing yet. I grew about another inch (maybe more) after that time and I definitely gained weight after then, but the outfit worked enough for the funeral. I think the skirt had to be pinned in to fit.

Again, I cannot recall exactly when I got too heavy for the dress suit either. It wasn't something I would wear on normal occasions, but I do know I was too big for it during my college years. I remember the arms especially being really tight. I don't think I ever wore it again after my grandma's funeral, but I've kept it. I've kept it with all my moves in college (and there were tons and tons of moves in college), with all the moves my husband and I have made (9 homes) and all the while, I haven't been able to fit it - not even close. To put it in perspective about my keeping it, I think there is maybe one box. One small box of things that I have kept from before college and college. There was a box of some other things, but they got lost in a move (makes me sad remembering that). So, this is one of the things I kept and not in a box, but always in my closet.

So, today I pulled it out and looked at it. Would it fit? Would it still be too small? I really didn't know. Imagine the shock I felt when I pulled on the skirt and realized it's a size too big. Wearable, but a bit big. Then imagine my bigger surprise when my arm slid right into the sleeve and when I did up the shirt, I realized the bust and waist are huge on me. This dress suit doesn't fit! And not because I'm too fat, as I have been for 20 years, but because I've gotten too small for it! I cannot even begin to share with you the shock of that. I really never thought I would be able to wear it again. And while yes, it's true, I can't wear it now either, but for a totally opposite reason. That is so weird. And so wonderful too.

I know I have one more item in my small box of keepsakes from high school. I'm almost afraid to get get it. I'm afraid I'll be sad that it's still way too tight. I felt huge when I wore that skirt in high school, so to be too big for it would make me feel huge, no matter my progress now. Oh, and I do have one item from 9th grade too. We had to make our own cheerleading skirts. Mine was awful because my great aunt made it for me and did the pleating wrong and chose the wrong color of red (too bright). Gee, how I can still recall being a bit embarrassed by it. That skirt I know I will never, ever be able to wear again. I was still growing a lot in 9th grade and filling out, so to not be able to fit that skirt is OK. I was a late bloomer and can expect it wouldn't fit no matter how thin I were to get now.

OK, maybe I'll go check that box (if I am even remembering correctly that it is in that box!) to see if that skirt fits. And so what if a skirt from when I was 17/18 doesn't fit, right?

Editing to add: couldn't find my cheerleading skirt, but found the other skirt. There is no way I'll ever fit into that again - no way. I call it a success I could even pull the skirt up and over my thighs and up to my waist, but I would need to lose about 3-5" on my waist to fit that thing. Um, no... that is not happening and probably not possible. It didn't make me feel sad. It just made me laugh. Maturity and perspective helps!

Stats for 10/9/11:

Beginning weight: 255.6  Now: 181.0
Exercise total hours in 2011: 277.5
Total miles walked in 2011: 817/1000

Saturday, October 8, 2011

I'm in a state of shock with my feet

I need a new pair of black heels, so I went to DSW and Marshall's today to find something - anything that was comfortable. I don't care how 'hot' a shoe looks, if I can't stand for a long time and feel comfortable, then I'm not buying them.

In the past decade, I wore a size 10 and sometimes an 11 in dress shoes as my foot was really around a size 10.5 and I ran into width problems with my feet being too wide.

Well, that is not my problem any more. I was trying on shoe after shoe and with the majority of the shoes I needed a 9.5. Not a single size 10 fits - not even close. I could wear a size 9 in some brands, but then my foot is too wide and sometimes too long, but in several pairs, the 9 was right for length. A 9?? A 9.5 seems just right, but unbelievably, my foot is too skinny in the heel to fit well in a lot of them. I know they make those heel slip thingees, but how can I be sure it will work?

I realized with trying on heels, that the only shoes my foot didn't slip was one that was holding my foot in place with a strap (like a Mary Jane) or a shoe covering the instep some how. Just how is this possible for my foot to shrink and to slip out of shoes? I would say it was very possible if it were a slow and gradual change, but it was quite sudden.

One time wearing my size 11 running shoe and they felt fine, next time, I felt my foot was swimming in the toe area and they are. Same with my zumba shoes. Both of these shoes were bought after I had already lost a significant amount of weight, so I can't even say it's that my feet are getting skinnier.

While that is part of it (foot getting skinnier), for sure, I really think my arch started to spring back up. Less weight on the arch, less pressure and strain on the arch. So weird. I haven't worn a size 9 since college, so about 20 years.

I didn't find any heels. I saw a pair I liked, but I just can't spend that kind of money on shoes. Plus, I'm a bit scared my feet will change sizes some more and then I'll have to re-buy even more things.

I have 3 pairs of high heel black shoes - two are way too big and one is wearable, but they aren't very stylish. Super comfortable, yes, but not stylish.

I did buy one pair of new shoes and they are funky. I found a very funky skirt so this goes with that skirt - nothing ordinary can go with it. Wish I could find a picture of the skirt or the shoes for that matter, but when you buy things on super clearance, photos online are long gone or impossible to find. I guess I could shoot a photo of me in it one of these days, but I still hate photos!

Stats for 10/7/11:

Beginning weight: 255.6  Now: 180.0 (75.6 pounds lost!)
Total exercise hours in 2011: 277
Total miles walked in 2011: 816/1000

Friday, October 7, 2011

Somehow muddling through

I actually cried for a millisecond last night as I was unwinding for the day. If any week can said to be hellish, this one can. And I sure hope it's about over.

In this week, my younger son with Asperger's got sick. While it seemed to be better on Wednesday, it got worse on Thursday. He started an antibiotic last night and is to get blood work and a chest xray this morning when he wakes up. It's now 10:30 am and he's still sleeping because his sleep has been awful this week. Every night he's been up for something. Last night at 3:45 I got him water and more tylenol for his fever and he must have been up for awhile for him to be still sleeping. The good news is that I just checked on him and he's sleeping peacefully.

The antibiotic is a nightmare in itself as he hates, hates HATES liquid medicine, but there are not pill forms of antibiotics for people of such light weight. So, liquid has to be suffered through. Last night we suffered through it for an hour for him to drink it mixed in with a glass of cocoa. Tonight we'll just try to get him down him in the syringe and hope he doesn't spit it out or vomit as there is no extra in the bottle.

On top of that, our cat got sick. Realized it after he peed and vomited on our bed. I've been to the vet with him this week as well and he's now on an antibiotic. Get an antibiotic into the cat is way easier than into my son at least. And, thank goodness, that cat is doing much better. Just now our other cat keeps hissing, growling and swatting at the cat that smells like the vet's office.

And this all, of course, is on top of a full 6 weeks of someone being sick in the house, which was only reprieved by people being healthy for a month as they were sick this summer for 3 weeks too! I'm exhausted from all of this and so behind on so many things.

Mowing was one thing I was behind on. We hadn't mowed since before Hurricane Irene and it was at least 10 inches long. I mowed the front yard yesterday after my older son came home from school, after running to the vet to get the cat's antibiotics and before my son's scheduled appointment with the pediatrician. I got the front yard done, and of course, just as I was finishing I ran over the mower's cord - first time I've done that in the 4 years we've had a corded mower.

That was my exercise for yesterday - one hour of mowing. And I have an hour more, but have to buy the cord for it first, of course. I'm also signed up for a spinning class tonight as I had to cancel my regular step class for this morning due to having a sick kid at home still.

Of course, I wonder, how in the heck would I handle all of this if I were working full time? And it scares me as I'm pulled pretty thin right now and I'm in the process of getting my resume in order and scoping out jobs to apply to. How will I juggle all of this? Ack!

But, I'm not turning to food despite all this stress. I've come a long way in curbing the emotional eating and I'm so happy about that. At least I've been able to break one habit over the last 10 or so years and it took years to get here.

Ok, I need to do other things today and be ready for when the little guy finally wakes up.

Stats for 10/7/11:

Beginning weight: 255.6  Now: 181.0
Exercise total hours in 2011: 276
Total miles walked in 2011: 813/1000

Thursday, October 6, 2011

The passing of Steve Jobs and lessons we can learn

What does this have to do with weight loss? Nothing, but some of his words do. A friend and spiritual leader of our ethical Society, Jone Lewis posted this on her facebook wall last night. They are words spoken by Steve Jobs at a Stanford commencement ceremony:

"Remembering that I'll be dead soon is the most important tool I've ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything — all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure - these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart."

Steve Jobs knew he was fighting a probable losing battle of cancer for the last 6 years of his life, but he battled on. He lived on and he kept doing what he did best and probably even got better at what he did best because he figured the above out. He knew his time was limited, so he followed his heart. Now, he was no ordinary man. His loss is a huge loss to the world. He once said, "I want to put a ding in the universe". That he did, more than most people ever do - even the most brilliant.

Now, we aren't Steve Jobs or of his caliber, but we can take lessons from his messages. And starting with this: We all are here for such a short time. Steve Jobs knew a bit more precisely when his end would come than most of us, but reality is, we all know it will come - sometimes sooner than we imagine. 

I think that I hit that wall of 'knowing' death last winter. I could see my future in front of me if I stayed the course. I would die younger than I imagined and it would be a probable slow and difficult death by either stroke, heart disease or diabetes. The writing was on the wall and I learned this all before my 41st birthday.

No, it wasn't cancer - but to be having heart arrhythmia, sky high blood pressure, very high blood sugars and a bum thyroid so early was a huge wake up call. I had a choice - as you all have a choice. I could do something or continue to live in denial.

Steve Jobs didn't live in denial of his cancer. He worked hard to try to beat it, but he also stripped away all his fears and followed his heart. Most people don't choose that option. Most people stay in denial and continue to live in fear - even at our own detriment.

Steve Jobs was going to die. He chose to follow his heart and because he did, he continued to revolutionize the technological world. What if he had just given up? Where would we be today? Not nearly as far, for certain.

I am going to keep this quote by Steve Jobs somewhere to remind me ever so often about the message. It would be so easy to forget the message without imminent death facing me as it was facing him, but it's always there, and I need to remember that.The other stuff - fear - just isn't worth it.

Stats for 10/6/11:

Beginning weight: 255.6  Now: 181.2
Exercise total hours in 2011: 275
Total miles walked in 2011: 810/1000 

Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Whe you live with an older person

When you live with an older person, you see the aging process more completely. I have known my mother in law quite intimately for 18 years, but have learned all the ins and outs in the last almost 2 years since we joined households. And it isn't pretty.

So, my thoughts, way back in my youth was, "thin is where it's at". "If I were just thinner..." Well, you know what? My mother in law was thin all her life until she moved to the United States. And I mean t.h.i.n. And, while she lived in Europe, in a center city, she walked everywhere and stayed relatively in good condition, but since moving here, her health has deteriorated quite a bit and her weight has gone up.

The big thing that happened is that she stopped walking all the time. Most of the US is for driving only. You have to drive to the store, the mall, the library, etc. The most walking you get is in a parking lot and even then, people park as close as they can. And honestly, I can't blame anyone because parking lot walking is awful walking - boring, stinky and hot in summer.

Second, she's always had a sweet tooth and never had to watch her weight, so she doesn't know how or isn't willing to change her eating to control her weight, blood pressure, or her cholesterol and blood sugar. She has significant blood pressure issues, borderline  cholesterol issues and is beginning to have blood sugar issues all of those things could be better if she exercised and if she dropped 15-20 pounds.

Now, she will say, 'it's my birth certificate" and part of that is true. She's 76 years old and you would expect some health problems here and there and that things would be slowing down. But, I also see these older women at the gym and our neighbors around us and I see how different it can be.

We live on a cul de sac with 10 houses. There are two young families, there's us, then three families are  almost empty nester families and the rest are all retired or semi retired. Those four families that are retired are original owners from 1967 and they are still out golfing every day, taking care of their lawn, walking all over the place and are super, duper active  in their late 70s and early 80s. Our neighbor next to us has severe osteoporosis, but she's out there weeding, shoveling snow and raking and she's about to turn 90 if she hasn't already.

There's a lady I see at the gym. She' has to be 65 and man, I want to be her now, let alone when I get to her age. I look at that and I realize: It's not about being thin. It's about being active. Active is the key. When you are active, you stay trimmer, your mind stays sharper and you live a healthier life.

I could have dropped this weight without exercise. Exercise just makes it easier, but it's the exercise that has made me much healthier and will be what keeps me healthier. Now of course, the weight loss put a lot less strain on my body and just that added years to my life and quality to my life, but it's the exercise that took it up to really good quality of life.

And that part I have to keep if I want to be like our neighbors around us and not like my mother in law. I'm watching my mother in law deteriorate a bit more every year. She was obviously very bright as she's a medical doctor who then specialized in psychiatry and neurology and she was very good at what she did. Yet now she resists learning anything new and forgets all the new things she learns.

I see with each illness how much weaker she becomes and never quite fully recovers. I see how one medicine keeps needing to be added after another to keep her healthy. And what's even scarier, is that she led a pretty healthy life compared to almost any American I can compare her to. She always ate good quality food and was active until 15-20 years ago. She has lived her life much better than I have ever lived mine until very recently. What was I thinking??? How much denial was I in?

So, this isn't only a weight loss journey. This is changing my life around and keeping it turned around forever. I want to be one of those old ladies who is up and going until I drop. I know there are a lot of things I can't control for, but I can at least do my part.

And my part included getting to the gym at 8 pm last night after being home with a kid with flu all day and will mean getting to the gym tonight after another similar flu infested day.

Stats for 10/5/11:

Beginning weight: 255.6  Now: 181.6 (74 pounds lost)
Exercise total hours in 2011: 274
Total miles walked in 2011: 808/1000

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

Snowballing effect

My cats decided they needed to get into the action with making my life he$$, so last night at 7 pm I went to my room to get something and I see there is cat vomit on the side of the bed - on the bed. I was just investigating that when I see a huge went spot smack dab in the middle of the bed. Holy $#%*!!! What is that? It went through two blankets, both sheets, the mattress pad onto (a tiny bit) the mattress. That has to be cat pee! What the he$$!!!

So, while my son is feeling a bit better with his recent dose of tylenol working, I'm stripping my bed, cleaning my mattress and doing laundry so that we have bedding for going to sleep. We don't have a spare mattress pad, so getting it done then and there was important.

If I knew what cat it was, (we have two), I think I would have tossed that cat out the door and said, "see ya!", But I didn't know which cat, though I had my suspicions.

Anyway, my son's medicine was beginning to wear off and he was getting tired and needed to go to bed, but he didn't want to walk upstairs. So, I carried him. I haven't carried him in probably two years as he's heavy. As you recall - 67 pounds. Well, I carried him with no problem and no major huffing and puffing. All that exercise and weight lifting has made me stronger!

By the time all that was done and I had a chance finally to exercise, I just had to laugh at myself. Right... exercise now when I'm frazzled and now tired. Nope... not today. Life had other plans for me today.

Later, I realized our cats that usually follow us all over the place are not. Well, one is, but where is the other? When I went to clean the litter boxes downstairs, I found the other one, weird look on his face - acting strange. I checked on him again before going to bed and he was still hiding down there. Uh-oh. A sick cat. That peeing on the bed was a memo to me that something is wrong. Well, he definitely found a way to get my attention. The vomit would have been enough! This morning he is still down there. So... a vet call is in order.

My youngest son is feeling better, though tired. No fever, or not much of one this morning, but he's still in bed, so you know he can't be feeling that great.

I am signed up for a bodypump class this evening, so I will get some exercise today somehow. Egad what a month this has been!

But, the sun is back out after weeks of it disappearing again and I'm getting hopeful the plague will leave us soon. Helps that I'm back down to my all time low today too.

Stats for 10/4/11:

Beginning weight: 255.6  Now: 181.8

Monday, October 3, 2011

Random thoughts

I'm trying to stay rested and clean with a sick kid in the house. I don't think it's pneumonia since he's vomited a few times. The flu? Another new bug brought into the house? Wonderful news. I was up four times last night, but tried to nap a bit this morning while he was still sleeping.

My mother in law is not feeling well yet and she wants to make soup. She's astounded I don't have soup makings in the house. Well, it's been hot and summery until a few days ago - not times I keep celery, carrots and tiny egg noodles in the house. I buy those things and then use them. She was just going to buy chicken to make soup - assuming everything else would be there. She drives me crazy.

I can't make it to a class this morning, but maybe I'll try to get to Zumba tonight. And if not, then I'll do a step routine in the basement. I'm actually looking forward to it still, so I must not be that tired.

And my creative juices are flowing. I used to do a baking blog and I think I'm going to start it up again. While I don't eat those things any more. My family does and with packing lunches, I've been getting more creative to pack more nutritious lunches. I can find fun bento lunch box blogs, but I'm not into making cute little faces and adding plastic picks to cutify lunch. I'm all about good tasting food and tailoring the food to the eater. With a super skinny and gourmand teenager and a kid with asperger's who eats a limited diet, I need to be creative - always. and I'm always mindful of the bottom dollar and with good foods (no perservatives and funny stuff in their foods). I spent all day on Saturday in the kitchen and again last night - preparing for lunches this week. That's 15 meals to think and prepare for (hubby and two kids), so it takes time. But taking the time when I have it, saves time in the mornings of the week when I don't have it.)

I don't know how I'll be able to keep that all up when I'm back to work full time, but I'll try because it's important.

Scale is a bit down this morning - inbetween the two things that make me gain weight during the stallout - period weight is coming off and ovulation weight isn't starting yet. At least I'm predictable!

Stats for 10/3/11:

Beginning weight: 255.6  Now: 182.6

Sunday, October 2, 2011

A really good day, except...

My youngest son is now sick. Hard to believe, right? The sickness is never ending in this house. It's unbelievable and so far (besides a one day migraine), I've escaped all of it. (Knocking all the wood I can find!)

No exercise today, but that was a planned day off, but now I won't be able to go to the gym during the morning hours tomorrow with a sick six year old at home. So, I'll find a class in the evening to go to. And I'm looking forward to it too! I miss it! Two days last week was not what I planned and it's not how I like it either.

Exercising helps me in so many ways. It keeps me less hungry. It gives me more energy and it makes me a happier person overall. When I exercise regularly. I feel good all around, so I just have to make time for it - even with the plague going through my house for the second time.

Stats for 10/2/11:

Beginning weight: 255.6 Now: 183.6

Saturday, October 1, 2011

This week was a bust for exercise, but a great month overall!

I only got in two workouts all week which is very unlike me, but too many interfering things and now a killer headache. I woke with a headache this morning and I'm scheduled to do a combo bodypump and bodystep class today (it's a special expo thing with the gyms today). I hope I can get the headache under control so I can go. I need to exercise!!!

Other than that, it's 'check on progress time'. While the month of August only gave me about a 3 pound loss, this month gave me a 7.6 pound loss and I'm still holding water weight from my period. So that is really, really good.

Last month I didn't lose anything off my chest and hips, only a bit from my waist and upper arms and thighs. This month I lost from everywhere. So, yes, I'm making great progress. I can feel it in my jeans too. Last month these size 12 jeans felt snug. Now they feel just right. Yep. I'm making progress and what I'm doing is working consistently. Yay! I really haven't seen a true plateau yet which is great. My monthly stall-outs are enough of a stall for me - I don't want to go months without loss. That would stink!

So, here are my stats for October 1st! October? It got here soooooo fast!

Stats for 10/1/11:

Beginning weight: 255.6  Now: 182.8

Monthly Measurements:

Starting chest: 47"  Now: 41" (change since last month: down 1" for a total loss of 6")
Starting Waist: 43" Now: 33" (change since last month: down 1" for a total loss of 10")
Starting Hips: 50" Now: 42" (change since last month: down 1" for a total loss of 8")
Starting Arm: 18" Now: 14" (change since last month: down .5" for a total loss of 4")
Starting Thigh: 30"  Now: 24" (change since last month: down .5" for a total loss of 6")