So, I decided to weigh myself

Just when I said I wasn't going to, I did. I got curious. And... it's all good! I'm actually down a pound from where I was the last time I weighed myself which was about 6 weeks ago. AND that was with a couple of date nights out and two conferences - one of which I totally didn't watch what I was eating.

And there has been other bigger eating days, but, it seems, I've balanced it out to neither really gain or really lose as a 1 pound loss is basically holding steady. THAT is a huge, huge success for me. That means I'm finding a balance! Yay Melissa!

But... when I stepped on that scale and realized that I was actually doing what I thought I was doing (finding a balance) that gave me extra motivation (at least for now) to do more. I could  make it to under 200 pounds by new year's if I stick to it. And my goal, ultimately is to just stay under 200 forever - ideally getting to 175, but for health and mobility reasons, at least keeping it to under 200.  That would also get me fitting into more of my clothes that are all packed up and unwearable!

I think I decided to step on the scale when I pulled out a skirt from the wardrobe that I thought would be too tight, but found, actually it fit perfectly or almost too loose. Then I knew for sure I wasn't gaining even a little bit as I had tried that skirt a couple months ago. I knew it meant I was holding steady or slightly losing.

It might give me the extra motivation to stick to better food choices during thanksgiving and Christmas season. Who knows. I want to enjoy my Thanksgiving weekend meals, but perhaps I'll skip the desserts to eat the meal.

I'm dealing with a "possibly" new food issue too. That I'll detail more tomorrow!

How I've decided to handle fall/winter - my blue months

I have decided that for the fall and winter - when I struggle DAILY with making good decisions and with fighting off the blues that I will not weigh myself daily or weekly or even regularly. I will just do the best I can do each and every day. That might mean that once winter is over that I have 10-15 pounds to lose, but that is better than gaining the 50 pounds I did last year. This is a lifelong journey - not a race.

So, I have no idea where I am with the weight. I don't want to know because I don't want any weight gain to depress me. And don't get me wrong - I could be losing weight too or holding steady. I have no idea. I do know I am making good decisions most days and most meals. I have not gone up in any clothing size. I'm solidly in a 14 in most brands and most clothes. (I was topping out - meaning they were getting tight a size 18 in May).

I am hungrier in Fall/Winter, so my caloric intake has gone up from where it was this summer, but I try to keep it so that I'm satisified, not super hungry. If I start to feel super hungry, I eat something and I try to make it a good choice food for me - meaning something that doesn't spike my blood sugar. Today I was out at an outlet mall. All there was for food was a vending machine. I was so proud of myself for choosing the roasted peanuts from all the offerings there. It held me until dinner where no candy bar or chips ever would for about the same amount of calories.

Some days are better and easier than others and I pat myself on the back for having a good day, but I don't beat myself up for having a difficult day. I just try to do better the next day. As I said... it's not a race and it's about lifestyle change. SLOWLY getting there!