Yesterday I charged up my bodyfit media core doohickey. AND I set new goals and inputted my last two days of eating (and exercising) on the nutritional tool I use, MyNetDiary.com.
First, it was a slap in the face to log on to the BodyMedia site. "You have gained 44 pounds since your last weigh in on March 28th, 2013". Um, thank you for pointing that out to me. I think I know. Can I erase this please? I don't want to see how I am whittling away at an OLD goal, but want to just look forward to this journey. Well, you can't erase past data, but least I can set new goals so I don't have to see the old one every single day. Gee... that would get depressing right quick.
Then, curious with how many calories I ate yesterday, I plugged in my food from the day before yesterday and yesterday. The last time I had logged my food was exactly one year ago. April 9, 2013. And I had gained 42 or 43 pounds from my last log in. Again, thank you very much for the slap in the face. I KNOW!!!! But, I was able to erase the old date - GONE.
Learning from the past is one thing, being beaten up by it is another.
After the Core unit charged it took me awhile to put it on my arm. I was a little nervous about that. Was I really read to take this journey on 100%? Did I really want to track my exercise (and sleep) habits again? Was I up for pushing myself that hard again?
And that is a bit hard for me to answer as I'm still feeling the extra tiredness of a bum thyroid, I know. But, in the end I strapped it on. Soon will come the questions from the kids I work with of, "What is that on your arm?" "Why are you wearing that?" "Is that a bandaid?" I love kid's curiosity! At least they ask! (And this is NOT my arm, but a model's arm for product advertisement).
Then I wanted to get the display clipped onto my pants for the bodymedia core. Of course, the battery on the display is dead. It's 3 years old and gave out the second I pushed a button to sync it. It was showing the correct time up until that time.
Of course, I didn't remember the passwords to either of these sites. I had to reset them both at MyNetDiary and at BodyMedia. And while I did that I see that it's been 13 months since I bought a 2 year subscription to BodyMedia - meaning I've wasted almost 13 months worth of the service, or about $50. And on the MyNetDiary site I see that they have a new look. Yep, a lot happens when you've been gone a year - in denial.
I'm not beating myself up about it - but kind of shocked at myself at how quickly all just fell apart. Now, I didn't stop exercising a year ago, but I stopped most cardio. I was just doing some strength training, but even that I stopped by fall and went to full spiral out of control mode.
But, I'm back - 100%. All the tools of the past are being used and are up to date and it's full steam ahead from here on out. I can do this. I know I can, but the sting of a year of giving into my demons is still fresh.
